Fantastic Four saves Hollywood!

They did what the legendary Jedi Knights and the Dark Knight could not: raise Hollywood out of its box office slump! With us today are the Fantastic Four's leader Mr. Fantastic and the ever-lovin' blue-eyed Thing.

"Don't forget me."

Who said that?

"Me. The Invisible Woman."

There's that voice again.

"Never mind."

Here's what Mr. Fantastic had to say about the biopic depicting the fateful journey into space that turned scientist Reed Richards, pilot Ben Grimm, Sue and Johnny Storm into the superheroes they are today: "Of course, this had the highest possible potential to succeed with today's audiences. I made a few tests, and it seemed to stimulate the right potions of the brain, provoking relaxing emotions throughout the person."

"In other words," interrupted the Thing. "It makes you laugh. It makes you cry. And there's plenty of clobberin', too."

The popular biopic has already made over 50 million dollars on its opening weekend, higher than the execs at Fox expected.

"You could say we clobbered the competition," stated a smug Thing.

When asked what the Fantastic Four will do with their share of the profits, Mr. Fantastic had this to say, "As you are well aware, most of our income comes from the revenue generated from my patents. We hope to donate all the profits from the movie to our favorite charities here in New York City."

And that's what makes them truly heroic.

Movie Review: Fantastic Four

I was very excited when I heard that they were finally making a Fantastic Four movie, almost as excited as when I learned that they were making an X-Men movie. Like X-Men, this is an origin story. The four explorers (with Victor Von Doom for a twist) go into space and get zapped by strange cosmic rays that forever change them...

But unlike the X-Men and most of Marvel's superheroes, the Fantastic Four are welcomed by the people they protect. They are celebrities. The series is also more lighthearted in tone than that of X-Men, Blade, and Daredevil. This translates pretty well into the actual film, especially the characters' various relationships, except for the Reed-Sue-Doom love triangle that never was. Unfortunately, the humor goes too far sometimes (like the pigeon thing, the dog covering its eye, etc) and could possibly hurt the viewing experiences.

The cast overall was pretty solid. I liked Ioan Gruffudd as Richards (my favorite character) though his gray streaks as a result of the cosmic rays seemed a bit silly. Chris Evans and Michals Chiklis were born for their roles, and can only make the usual rocky relationship between Ben and Johnny all the more amusing. While Jessica Alba wouldn't have been my choice for Sue, she held up better than I thought, leaving Julian McMahon as the weakest link.

But that might not be all his fault. His character, Von Doom, is an unfortunate clone of Willem Dafoe's Norman Osborne: After having business troubles and exposed to strange matter, Doom just decides to go crazy and start killing people. And the final battle between the FF and Doom seemed all too short. (That whole "First lession in chemistry.." started to get a little cheesy too.)

The movie's a commendable effort to bring Marvel's First Family onto the big screen. It's better than X-Men and Daredevil, but just doesn't hit the heights of X2, Spidey, and Batman Begins. Still, it was one of the most enjoyable introductary-exposition movie since Hellboy. B

CD Review: Batman Begins

Okay, I've read enough reviews for this score to know what to do. First, I blantly gush about how good this movie. (Seriously, it is really good.) Then, I mention Messrs. Elfman and Goldenthal, and that this score is nothing like their work and that Elfman's theme will always be associated with Batman, and while Goldenthal's scores were more over the top they too kicked butt. (I also should be mentioning all the fan boys sad that there's no more Elfman theme, but that's too silly.)

Anyway, onto the review: First of all, it isn't a question of if the score is good. I've seen the movie. Hans Zimmer and James Newton Howard wrote a score that fits this movie like a glove. It's dark, moody, scary, heroic, and a touch romantic all when it needs to be.

But I'm not reviewing the movie (yet). I'm reviewing the soundtrack which is a different story all together. All the tracks are named after different species of bats, which Zimmer and Howard must have thought was clever clever. Unfortunately, when you're listening to six plus minutes of quiet, ambient cues with no real thematic tug, a real title might help the listener picture what scene the cues supposed to be from.

But it's rather hard to do that, even after seeing the movie, because all the cues are cut up and placed together in a general mish mash. Only a few cues, like Myotis and Molossus, sound like they're intact. Zimmer and Howard created a few good themes for this movie including the Batman theme (heard at the end of Vespertilio and mostly through Molossus), the Wayne theme heard at the beginning of Macrotus, and Ducard has his own Eastern motif that snuck onto the end of Artibeus.

These themes are all rather cool to hear, but the soundtrack disappoints in the most vital way that every superhero soundtrack must deliver: a dashing, heroic version of the hero's theme. In the movie, it's everywhere. On the soundtrack, it's almost nonexistent. It's present in such tracks like Myotis and of course Molossus, but it should also be on a lot of other tracks too. The beginning of Artibeus is the cue for batman's first appearance but the music is cut off before it comes to the grand protrayal of the Batman theme. The same could be said for Antrozous.

In summary, it's the sad case of a good score getting a bad presentation on the soundtrack, much like The Last Crusade and X2, or at least having a vengeful editor.

Favorite Tracks:
1. Vespertilio
3. Myotis
10. Molossus
11. Corynorhinus

Music in the movie: A- Music on the CD: C

Fantastic Four Score Preview 2

Go to composer John Ottman's web page (www.johnottman.com) to hear clips from the Fantastic Four score, and see pictures from the recording sessions.